Oh God what a dreadful morning.

My heart is racing and the palpitations are going through the roof. I feel like I’m on the verge of a damned heart attack!

As they never got to the bottom, or so I believe, of these damn chest issues I simply wouldn’t know. I get worried about something happening right now because I don’t want to upset my daughter.

But added to this I’ve been having an issue with my right leg .. partly it’s an issue with magnesium deficiency. It so it seemed to until this morning.

I get a tightening in my right calf muscle sometimes that kind of feels like a large stone is wedged breath the skin. A painful one.

This has played to more and more of late and I was forced to dig out a few quinine sulphate tablets I knew I had among my other pills. I’ve even bought a couple bottles of Magnesium, Calcium and Vitamin D3 pills from Holland & Barrett. Did this a few days back.

But this morning it’s bad .. as are the palpitations and racing heart. Christ, I wonder what the hell else is going to occur today?!

Gnomeo & Juliet, the animated movie, was on TV this morning and this has endured from like an hour prior to that starting, was watching something about weird animal behaviour with Chris Packham, and is still affecting me into this next film of Rise Of The Guardians.

Now in the past and at hospital around 6 months or more ago one Doctor seemed concerned about the palpitations but even more so on their duration. I had told a Dr Destempel that it had endured for at least a couple hours one night, until I feel asleep. That statement raised an eyebrow. In fact he looked slightly shocked.

Typical of something happens right at the point when I’m about to attempt to clear another hurdle I hope will be the last.

Typical also that should something happen it’s before I got a decent year, or summer, in with shooting with my professional camera.

Typical too that I’ve sorted out the blog, I believe, and that it should not be long before that finally achieves something?!

Been having these recurring visions of having a heart attack on a bloody bus tomorrow.

Also been thinking of how typical it would be that if all this shit caused the death of me that no one in here would get to know! Well maybe you might .. eventually? If the ownership passed to my daughter in sure she would out something here .. unless all this has had the same effect on her. Which is a much greater possibility than I like to admit to myself.

I have to remember today to get things together for what is coming. I have to get my medical records together. Possibly other things too .. all to do with records. Lol.

My Good God why does life hurt so much?

How can life hurt so much?

How can human being force you through so much pain?! How the hell can health professionals, Doctors and nurses be a party to this?!

It’s officially the worst Easter weekend in the history of Easter weekends. Well .. in my history of Easter weekends.

The last and only second Christmas I spent with my daughter, first when she was one, might also be the last?! That’s how it feels right now.

Due to the odd feeling, slight pain intense discomfort and the possibility of a spasm that hurts so much you cannot actually speak .. I have used my robe belt as a tournicade on my right calf muscle.

I am going to re-link .. something back into this blog over the next few days .. provided my heart or something else does not give up the ghost, so to speak.

I have not posted any evidence for a fair old while and I do not know if old links are still working, I know of one service that no longer exists.

I had to look this up very recently when I sent someone proof of things I had been involved with in the past and to show that I can prove most things I had said.

Added to this and in recent times readers may have found things that I have done .. questionable but it is how I stated. For arguments sake I stated that it is the public services that set of fears and not people .. or bad people as such. Well .. I can kind of prove that and I will do this in the coming days and once listened to .. there will be no doubt left at all.

It will also go a million miles to show why I have said some things about a certain group of people and you will realise that this same group is literally behind everything I have endured, am enduring and have to endure for the foreseeable future. Quite unfortunately.

Also I had this .. tweet come my way by way of a notification which was about conspiracy theory stuff that was in the tinfoil hat territory. That does not mean to say that anything that sounds like tinfoil hats are involved is therefore not true. But you know what I mean ..

.. especially when they are speaking of stuff that sounds like something from an American Dad episode when they claim that the CIA deliberately give you terrible nightmares, presumably from some contraption or other? Oddly they also mentioned MI5 which might be how they got linked to me and how I ended up getting a notification about a tweet?

Hmm I wonder if they have a contraption that sets of anxiety or rapid heart rates?! Anyway ..

What I have are facts .. and predictions.

Upon listening to the upcoming recording there may be those that hear about it after already visiting my blogs that then say “Holy crap! He was telling the truth?!” Lol.

C’est la vie.

In the meantime I will try to not go out of my mind while wondering who in the hell I would contact if I did?!


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