I stagger in a haze so early in the morning to get downstairs.
Not having sleep the night before and with several pains affecting me, I am tired.
Oh how tired have I felt lately now to the point of serious affect.
I am anxious as I reach the kitchen .. no one else is downstairs and I ponder as I put the kettle on.
Realisation sets in that Twiggy is free to visit and as the kettle builds up heat I reach down and run my hand across her fur.
She realises it is me from the touch of my hand, makes a small groan and then purrs as she rises.
She circles me, bumping into things and I watch in sadness as her head moves from side to side in her desperation to make out her surroundings.
She is more affectionate than normal and I wonder if she misses my regular morning visits due to the way things are?
She seems disappointed as I return to the kettle briefly to fill my mug before I return to her, still circling in search of me.
She momentarily freezes as she feels my hand once more.
I ask myself why I am finding my own things so difficult to contend with and why things are so hard.
When I look at this cat, blind as a bat and a constant struggle to live day by day.
I think again of the possibilities of an operation to cure Twiggy’s blindness and would love the chance to look.
I think again of a return of that which is owed to me and payments from other sources too and how this would have me cure this cat I love so much.
Never a cat cry and never a whimper and small in frame and stature to appear almost dwarf.
I wonder to starting a funding campaign but recall how bad this went for disabled children in recent times.
All relies on media agents and court judges for so much suffering of so many people not only those closest to me.
That is if ‘the man’ has not made preparations previous and current so that I may not stick it to him.
Surprising what occurs to me when I visit the cat down stairs.