It is somewhat peculiar to me that for sometime my own condition which renders me a disabled person has altered my vision.

Starting well over ten years ago, oh yes ten years, at first it was just on and off. More off than on but over time this shortly changed until it swung around the other way. Completely.

Today I don’t get pain free days at all although I can briefly so an impression of someone without a disability for a couple of hours… of I’m lucky and provided I have remembered to take both prescription drugs that deal with it.

Now at a point that would be a very long time ago now, more than ten years as I have been affected since around 2001, I stated to see things in a different light. Well I could day it’s like some of the lights were not switched on at all!

Early on I stated to notice that my setting axes available for disabled people seemed to be everywhere. Computers and robotics had fief to the stage that they could be of genuine help to this less mobile than others. In many different ways too. Just as it did to me is totally believable that many out there that take so much for granted think disabled people have everything ‘covered’.

Nothing could be further from the truth I am sorry to say.

As my own condition gradually become worse I started to ask questions to the authorities and public services and myself. I did boot hey any answers and in fact arrogance and rudeness.

This gradually become worse and I had no idea what was wrong and at first it seemed neither did the authorities. Well until such a time I started to get closer and closer to an answer while they seemed to pull farther away.

At some point I raise they did boot want to know and this is why they were pulling away.

Many things said to me stayed to smack of dishonesty too.

I started to wonder if they indeed did know what ailed me but was convenient to admit to knowing?

The whole time this was occurring over a period of ten years I was also noticing more and more of the difficulties of getting about. Even short trips.

Now due to my interests I used to travel to the west end in London a great deal. From about ten years of age I used to do this. Whether it was Marvel and DC Comics, HiFi equipment, TVs, Computers or phones there were several stores to cater do my interests. Of those other interests like Ichthyology, Batrachology and Herpetology along with astronomy, martial arts and mountain bikes there were stores for these too. Even if they were confined to bookshops like my old favourite Foyles.

The last time I was in the west end doing any of the above was a very, very long time ago now. I did pass through once briefly a few years back to get to Victoria Coach Station to get to Liverpool. Long story and actually on here. Getting up there was bad enough but coming back was an absolute nightmare.

Thanks to completely shite and awful public transport in London made worse by a Tube twin strike I did not know was going on until I got to the Victoria Tube Station!

Annoying, painful and stressful and that’s an understatement.

When it is like this and the vast majority of people on public transport are bloody rude and selfish you do not want to do it again.

Now this is vitally important as far as this blog is concerned. That is… you don’t want to do it AGAIN. This is how it starts for disabled people. Some unfortunate souls have things thrust upon them much faster than this.

Now unless your a complete bloody idiot you should be aware that we are primates? We don’t generally like sitting around doing nothing ever if we live with people. Maybe there are mental health issues, personality disorders and perhaps even people with laid back attitudes possessing conditions that the NHS don’t want you to know about our perhaps, as I thought for a few years of my own, had not been discovered by medicine yet? These would be a very tiny fraction of people and only a fraction of those the routes that are just plain lazy.

As things became more difficult for me I started to notice that there were things… well missing out there. Missing for people for conditions like mine and I’m not talking about polite and empathic people either.

Over the months this for worse and I also started to look at things for people worse than I was. It was not good.

I then thought well if it’s this bad in London then what about other parts of the UK? Maybe we are actually the worse and maybe everywhere else is a lot worse than the capital? I don’t know.

Of all the things I have explained to people when asked I always state that my condition is an absolute bloody nightmare. I often think I would, eventually I knew I would, be better off had I had legs missing? I then stated to want to their myself in front of a bus as this works either put me out of my misery or I would be wheelchair bound and treated better?!

That is quite literally how it got for me. I then realised that if it for like this for me then it must have done for others too?

So it’s fair to say that this blog was intended to highlight many of these things. But I wanted to do this in a completely different way and using methods I had ashtray been putting into practice for several years.

Most people in any argument, battle, difference of opinion or even on the verge of searching for legal help to their rights, don’t bother looking we do not have any, will get any titbit of information and wave it in the air and their it in the faces of their adversaries.

Not me.

I wanted each person, that gave a crap about anyone or anything other than themselves that is, to start reading on here, raise an eyebrow, delve deeper and realise there was no way around it not only did I speak the truth but I posted evidence of it over and over again with each enemy until it reached the level it was incontrovertible. Leaving no lingering doubt whatsoever.

I have also encouraged others who have themselves been suffering to employ any or all of my tricks to help yourself get through anything or best anyone.

It may not seem like it but I am winning and in a big way but my enemies are doggedly stubborn. But then they have an incredible amount to lose.

What they fail to realise is that this ‘amount’ gets bigger and bigger the more they fight.

They also fail to take that there are certain nodes along the path…think of them as milestones, that I aim for that then raises the… bar, for want of a better term, that suddenly makes them look ten times more guilty than they did previously.

I am heading for one that’s a few months away.

I am repeatedly stunned that on each occasion they have failed to actually soot this is happening. Still the mite stupid and incompetent I can make them look along with corrupt then the worse it will all be when the time comes.

It is also a frustrating life a disabled person has and I like my independence in more ways than one. But I hate the fact that I have been giving in to requesting help and get told ‘no’, this makes me angry.

I also have issues with my memory too and this causes me to FAFF about to the point of breaking point several days a week that adds passion to the mix. I forget things… regularly and several times a day. Quite literally. This makes me angry.

To the point I understand why Alzheimer suffers get angry and frustrated.

When I think of things, hear of things, see things and read things they can often make me angry.

I wanted to convey the anger, disappointment and anything else I get. An insight into the mind of a disillusioned Brit and what makes us angry, especially those with disabilities who, whether they know or or not, are being phased out by successive British governments despite the fact that neither the technology or help to be solely self sufficient exists, is in place or on offer from the authorities. So just like they were one responsible for housing homeless people but now regularly tell the public it’s not their obligation to house them they want to do this with disabled people.


If they succeed I don’t want any part or any link to a country or its society… no society is the wrong word, it’s people if they are that selfish. Literally.

So this blog is also a test of the morality of a nation but which itself would take a very long time.

So I was surprised when I saw the below article with a line I often state to people who just don’t get it…

‘Going shopping is a nightmare for me’ but this lady is wheelchair bound and if there is one thing I have spotted repeatedly and for a decade now is that despite what you think is in place it is nowhere near enough.

My own shopping issues is because of the pain, impatience and memory loss meaning that I rarely leave the house without having to visit a supermarket before I cone home that has me literally sweating buckets and hobbling or limping quite bad on some days.

The word ‘disabled’ had been quite deliberately removed from the Welfare System which for me is not a Welfare System anymore and just seen as an expensive system they want rid of.

Little by little a bunch on total and immoral wankers that work for these firms see the use of anger and swear words as far worse than what they are doing?!

Well I wonder if someone at some point can point out to them that to do this is to also remove the word ‘ CIVILISED’ from our society?

Hmm maybe when they get my next letter regarding their refusal of my Personal Independent Payments they will come into this very post and read this bit?

Maybe they night actually then figure out that I am bow leading them down the most dangerous path yet?

If they are reading this… sorry if you are reading this had it occurred to you today I might have something in the works that will run concurrent with this final lap with you?

No, I bet you didn’t. Well I have TWO!!


‘Going shopping is a nightmare for me’


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