I had only published a post or two about the fact that many, many people and industries have failed to realise it’s both a small world and lies of oddballs in it when I read the story I have linked below!

This was not on my usual AppyGamer… err App and actually via the BBC News App.

Here is a classic example unfortunately of both these things I have previously referred to. Game programmers, like many industries, want their products to sell. Unfortunately this takes the form of misleading information more and more these days when things are getting harder and harder, despite what they tell you.

The drive to play games, sorry to all the women of there I may be about to upset with the facts, is the strongest human desire we have. In fact that sentence is not strictly true and when I correct it, which I now will do, I will prove it…

Or is the strongest women desire we have. That all animals have and the reason had been staying us in the face for a long time.

Much as I love computer games I find them funny things and what’s have. There are just the most recent form of entertainment and can come off with conker ways to keep its entertained. By playing games. I must point out however that the computers of the decades ago would leave any of us for dead in any given game, except maybe a bare few. Chess being one but only up until a point in time when one was created that beat the Chess champion at the time. A Russian.

So it is true to say that all along programmers have had to think about how difficult they make their games. Some people are extremely good while others not so. Some are good at the puzzle elements of some games while others are not and hate them. The truth is that there could be something to speak to everyone’s taste and strengths. But the is not. There may have been a time but not these days.

Unfortunately game creation is driven by yet another bunch of people who do nothing in regards the creation but want to make all the money they can. You can bet your life that they will not be interested in certain have types and want that ideal title they appeals to all people. It does not exist. Never has. I am well aware that may have reviews may raise an eyebrow at what I will say?

Or desire to play games comes from our desire to become smarter in order to survive. I is the exact same drive that kittens cannot resist in passing with each other and rapidly moving small objects. The same applies to Dogs, Foxes, Big Cats, Bears and the list goes on and on.

However we have become modernised by a system that for most of us is beyond our control. Yet many of those that do get control then abuse it. We are just never happy. Plus modern life had become more and more tedious, stressful, a minefield and mostly… body boring.

So what do we do? We use things as a means to escape. Many reviewers love to be able to use that one immortal line of “I’ve never had add much fun playing a computer game!” because our reward for being presented with something knew and defeating it is an increase in dopamine in the brain. This is the substance that gives us a feeling of euphoria legit due to the fact that if such a situation presented itself then we feel we would… survive it.

That’s a longish answer to ‘What is fun?’

As the last few decades past by computer games became more realistic. In visuals at any rate. However some people like this to be not to difficult. Not too complicated. I myself have a selection of titles that vary in the amount of thought needed.

Quite unfortunately I suffer with a condition that means fire a number of reasons I am tired much of the time, yet I never get anything done and many things I love doing I either an to tired to, or write incapable of much of the time. It also scrambles me memory from time to time but only in a time span of a few minutes to a few years. Yet I can remember this from decades ago and it makes no sense. It is a burden on two ways as it’s frustrating and I have no idea if it will get any worse bite how bad it can get. This is true of the memories and the several areas of pain, several areas of discomfort and anything else which may arise to join the others.

I simply do not know and not even sure if there is a way of knowing.

Yet I was and am pursued relentlessly which did a long time for me down and made the symptoms of anxiety and depression a lot worse. These days I do not really care and in fact I am often in their faces constantly as the best defence is a good offence.

At the exact same time there is no one or the which I can find that can genuinely help people in difficulties and not even anyone who can sympathise or even fully understand. I am anyways in their faces too and the same idea as above applies.

What I am leading up to is that we can all have our demons to run away from. We never asked for them nor do we deserve them but it feels like we do, or some unknown reason exists that means we do. That’s how they make you feel.

In the unfortunate cases of families then to much pressure on one individual can unfairly have that pressure thrust upon their partners all at once along with the total blame.

Yeah I have been there too and I knew at the time I was not to blame but I did not know the exact reasons why. I do today.

So it’s totally forgiveable that we look for either escape or solace.

Today there are a lot more people having than their used to be. So this firm of escapism means a lot to many. Some though are no more than simple minded folk who have been manipulated, lied to and upset by those in charge of creating their beloved forms of escapism.

For a long time now it has become an obsession for greedy publishers to rush things out the door because they are impatient for more money. Unfortunately this means to sub standard and even completely crap games being released.

What’s worse is its expected by the media too.

Sometimes some things simply cannot be perfect on time but sometimes it’s inexcusable. But then again if they delay a title then those simple dim-witted folk get frustrated about this too.

The Internet had been used by these greedy corporates to make more money because it’s made the world a great deal smaller but that in turn also brings with it bloody big problems too. But it’s only in recent times that celebrities have had these problems fixed upon then that it mashes the media.

So many things are back to front and it is worrying to think where it will all lead to.

What is obvious and had been for a very long time is that there are groups of people out there, severance of then in fact, should so the childish and greedy bullshit and stop and think about others.

Those that sid think about this that create the things they love and the creators sound think about those they are creating for.

I don’t care, ergo neither will they, that you listen to this and toy listen to that from the consumers/fans, whatever. It is a case of finding that elements that distort the lines between those two and cut this out as if it is rotting flesh. Because in essence that is what it is. A bunch of people whose only input is to come up with clever marketing that will piss a lot of people off. Most of the time. As populations grow and more of the poorer people get computers, consoles and phones this will only get worse because you will be dealing with… leagues of people not just a small group here and there.

Maybe then the idiots that like to show what low life scum they are by sending death threats might actually go quiet too?

You have but two choices… appease them… or catch them!! Then make a bloody example of them.

For those affected by the low-lifes I can only strongly urge you do a search of the Internet for stalking advisory groups. The Police do feck all I know but tell them what happened anyway and get a crime number.

Big firms ‘must condemn GamerGate’



Well here is something I have harped on about from time to time, the price of drugs especially those that are for cancer.

Here someone, one of the Cancer Charities I think it was, is making a noise about it when someone is offering only half a sandwich to a starving man. That remark is actually an understatement and then some.

Still here is a link to a report about it and likely it still be another one of those things forgotten about in time despite possibly getting some promises of action?

Sickening it really is and I think it’s long overdue that these evil people have the tables turned on them in my opinion.

Drugs fund ‘papers over cracks’


Well some things…sorry , people…sorry , morons will continue to drive institutions into the ground before they will release their iron like grip on their positions of fleecing the British taxpayer for unearned salaries.

The NHS Trusts are silk sitting their paying chicken thinking that the government week just cave in and give them mountains me of the money?!

It’s become a theme of the Conservative Government we find ourselves with. They state that something is going to go but they remain. One is Atos and the other are the NHS Primary Care Trusts. I never thought of it before but what a joke it is to use the words ‘Primary Care’ in their title? What a joke! Huh, and then the word ‘trust’,  lol.

The only other things I remember the Conservative Party promising was getting our economy growing again and promising the Citizen’s Advice Bureau that they will change this attitude within the DWP of bit accepting me than one ailment with someone applying for Disability Living Allowance. This was covered at the time by the BBC.

So the three big names of the latter sorry of…

Citizen’s Advice Bureau
Department of Work and Pensions
David Cameron

So what has happened since that later sorry broke for years ago? Zero, nada, nothing, zilch.

So what have any of these names either said or done about this side then? As above!

I cannot help but ask myself how many times this happens? How many serious this get mentioned by the big names and then nothing is done?!

This for me is totally unacceptable along with inexcusable and I will never, ever complain about members of the public and their actions during any demonstrations regarding the government or the public services ever.

Purely because their must simply be a humongous number of people now feverishly frustrated and angry about things like I have described here. Maybe even themselves or someone close to them getting hurt or, heaven forbid, worse?!

Because that is how I am about what happened to those close to me as well as myself. It is the driving force behind this blog and the reason I am intend on dismantling the world’s and playgrounds of this evil centre of British Society and turning the tables on them. This is the only way that they and those waiting to fill their shoes week ever get the message to stop or gave the ultimate consequences.

Faced with death by Tiger or Army Ants I will take the Tiger any day of the week. It will be quicker and less painful trust me.

The moral of the story is think about the numbers. Consider the length of time suffering and the possible levels of anger.

You can say what you like about me but even a year from now the British public operating together in any numbers will be a far worse fate than I! They will also get the support of every single Brit that had ever deserted these shores in frustration.

If things have not changed between now and when the day comes then I hope that I could job forces with those intent on justice and change and be at the forefront of the protesting! I never really mention much about protesting but I do think of it. I do imagine myself there if it gets that far but I hope it does not. To stop this inevitable fate then actions need to be taken as they are set out in my head, where they stay, lol. Some things are not for me to tell,  they are for others to figure out what to do before it is to late. Otherwise what is the point?

The messages need to come in forms of action and not talk anymore and from those that mean it. This is the only way.

Because you have taken too long and done nothing.

Because the promises everyone remembers you making you failed to make.

Because words no longer work anymore.

Because you have single handedly and slowly destroyed what it means to be democratic. Your still destroying what it means to be democratic.

Because you have spent years proving diplomacy does not work and is only ever a means to kick the can down the road while hoping things get better while they get terribly worse.

The time of diplomacy and words does not have much life left to live. I suggest strongly that the idiots take note because large swathes of land and high walls will never protect you from the potentially largest angry mob history has ever seen and the entire British Army and the Police won’t be much help. When it gets to the stage that the mess we are in has affected enough people that many Police Officers and Army members know well the this also starts to diminish.

All this would be well known well ahead of the dangers taking place if, that is, you had the slightest intelligence to know just how small a world the Internet has made things. Yup the Internet or one of those things that many companies have been allowed to use and abuse to rip off everyone in the country.

Yes they live their modern day gadgets but must be getting pretty pissed by now about the shite situation their bills are in?

What? You don’t know?! You have been feeding this blog, right?

And they moan about the jobless and disabled expecting… GRRR ‘HAND OUTS’!!

Listening to Prime Ministers Questions in the House of Commons anyone wound think that David Cameron was producing gold bars out of his backside every time he sat on the loo?!

Who the bloody hell is he trying to convince? They really are just a bunch of self obsessed morons and without the balls to be open and make the correct choices. Maybe they think the public week just very bored and go back to normal at…. some point? Lol!


NHS trusts counting on bailouts


Well I suppose really that I knew that many companies were… helped from going under with some inventive…no, no I am not going to give anyone credit. Just because a bunch of morons go unnoticed by another bunch of morons does not make them clever.

Very, very far from it.

Oddly Tesco is not even one of the names I thought would go down the tubes but stayed around. That would be Argos. Well one of them. Maybe the only one? Lol, I don’t recall what I thought back then.

So it was reasonable to assume that at some point there might be another set of names in trouble. Maybe a whole group that were a bit fast and loose with the money and maybe even tax payments too?

Another example of how the punishments for lesser crimes for those most desperate is far greater than those with far more cash but stole or defrauded more money than those poorer and desperate people. Well unless of course their crimes are against other rich, powerful or famous people. Unless it is against Randy Quaid, probably.

As they are not getting us out of the trouble they got us into it is safe to assume there will be more names coming out in situations like this?

There are… a few retail names that have been up to this that strongly suggest they themselves are… teetering. On the edge. So to speak. In fact one of them did not even start this trickery recently and someone after I found out they were doing it, I later found out that a famous national tabloid did an article way back in 2002, give or take a year or two.

Yet for the next dozen years they carry on doing it without being challenged by anyone? Any guesses as to how? Lol.

Another interesting question is that if they were up to this underhanded practice way back then, then how on the world have they survived during these last years? Oh well their only High Street rival of Comet did go out of business a few years ago, leaving only Maplin.

Tesco in criminal fraud probe


I simply Co is not they be eked the headline to this BBC report and I got angry when I realised that the 650 missing children it was referring to say fire one area, Manchester, only?!

This is of course to do with the paedophile rings and yes the first words you think of are “Muslim Men”. I did and do. But one thing worries me in this and that is that the Muslim Men are flecking incompetent twats as well being scummy, stench ridden slugs that insult the single footed slimy leaf munchers. The biggest morons going!

Because the practise they have been guilty of is still going on and it turns out Muslim men are not the only perpetrators. There is of course they other ring made up of celebrities and powerful people.

Incompetent because this other ring can get the authorities to blame the incompetent Muslim idiots who walked right into the trap by being just as gross, sick and depraved as the Muslim men.

There is one other thing that one and all need to be aware of and I can only now give you the horrible possibilities gets in the UK because now I have a number. The number is 650 and the location is Manchester but this is just one place.

In my own… endeavours I came across these people performing the same sick things in both Liverpool and Birkenhead. If your a Muslim man living in one of these two areas and up to this practise then good luck… staying alive that is when it becomes widespread knowledge locally! I happen to have had experiences with… Merseysiders for over 25 years. Trust me you really do not want the locals knowing.

Oops! That’s torn it!

I monitored these morons from afar without then knowing… well that is until I needed two separate men GONE on separate occasions and told them along with what I am capable of doing to each of them. Unlike usual British people and the Police force I am very willing to completely break every law in the land without batting so much as an eyelash for… exceptionally depraved people that are killers or rapists and double so if this involved children.

So what you can take from this is that it is not just the major cities and the fact that ‘my lot’ had links to both Manchester and Birmingham then you just know Birmingham has a problem too. But Birmingham is somewhat bigger than Manchester with more people. Hmm is just occurred to me it had a bigger population of Muslims too.

My god I just hope they put a stop to this and it is not going ‘UNNOTICED’ in other places too?!

I am afraid it gets worse though those that have been visiting here a long time and those more… inquisitive will already know what I am about to explain.

At the time I was doing this… monitoring I… collated everything I… knew and I passed it on to both MI5 and GCHQ, yes that includes the fact the were locations in Birmingham and Manchester along with Liverpool and Birkenhead. These were the only ones I was… privy to. I forwarded on more as and when I had collected together more data that I thought might be relevant. To them. Later in all this I then contacted the Police… in Merseyside. I got a call from a John Middleton and the next day had DC Simon Broadhurst and his partner DC Louise… surname unknown. I warned them about having in the place as I did not want a particular person getting hurt or killed off they got something wrong, even the timing.

I do not allow margins of error when the consequences can get innocent people hurt. Cannot seem to prevent causing pain to myself but I will not be responsible in anyway for the death of others. Write the opposite in fact. The two Detectives, oooh just remembered I have to do the collated post for the Police, spent 5 hours here in Enfield asking questions and took some copies of things for themselves. These… things were seperated and I warned then that the higher authorities, though not now sure that they are, had already been informed. Couple months before or more in fact, can’t argue remember now. Well it was three years ago… no four years ago?

I am afraid it gets better still.

The data I referred to were…. you guessed it, audio recordings. Many, MANY audio recordings. Some of that audio was taken from one suspects phone from 250 miles away.

All of that was passed on to the authorities I mentioned and I also recorded the Police while they were here. I always do. I figured they could not be trusted and I was bang on the money.

They started to lie to me when they did feck all. They did feck all and then have me bars faced lies to cover their incompetence. I guess the 500 mile round trip at the tax payers expense was part of the… appearance that they were going to do everything they could. But then never even left the building on the data I provided them.

Too bad for them. Your given the tools through my own hard work with no resources or cash and if you fail and then fecking lie about it I will expose you in the worst possible way!

Yes all this data is on here… wellll enough of it to be inescapable and make them look inexcusable.


It’s all about the numbers and the networks don’t you know? Lol!

Now I just shudder when I think about how many other Police Forces and Local Councils end up being the focus of attention because of failing children in their own neighbourhoods?

It is a little like the attitudes over the football fans at Hillsborough all those years ago? The comments about the fans being low lifes and criminal? Maybe we are just a lower form of life not worth rising getting injured over?

Someone will eventually have to ask them that. But of course the answer will be the usual lie of ‘no’ or evasive manoeuvres that did not include an answer of any kind. Maybe those guilty of the latter do not like telling lies?

That Police post is coming soon,  I have actually posted very little this year and is high time I got going to get a head start on next year?!

Some 650 missing children ‘at risk’


Well this I did not expect!

It seems that the DWP and their new PIPS Department along with Atos want to break from habit and actually outdo themselves?!

Now this is not going to be long winded for once, because I simply cannot be arsed with it and I do need to get out and get some shopping.

However I will now state that I cannot help but think that Atos actually want to be forced out of doing these things?! It was featured on the news that they announced they would be breaking the contract and getting out months ago. They are still around so one can only assume that the government and the DWP have forced them to carry on being the fall guy! Or paid a much big back hander out of the British taxes?! ‘Assume’? Listen to me, no I KNOW they are being forced/paid too and its obvious.

I can also add finally before I add some scanned shots that when I stated what they had recently said in correspondence someone I know that has nothing to do with either the DWP or Atos recently stated, “No you cant be talking to Atos, they do not do the assessments anymore the government got rid of them!” to which I pointed out that they most certainly are still there and though it is no excuse it is the government and the DWP that have been shafting the British public.

Now first up is the letter and then a couple of scans of a little document that was left here… hmm a few nights back.

I will NOT say anything except other than to go back to a very recent post with an email from Atos, them denying they made an appointment for August, only the one in October and that they are not deliberately making appointments far away and early in the morning so that patients do not reach them.

Well they kind of got caught out in the assessments by many people, so was bound to try something new.

Make a note of the times and the locations of the previous two appointments whose letters are both on here along with the three letters of apologies from them for not turning up to Home Visits they claim I never asked for and they do not do.

Those original letters informing me of the appointment times and locations are also on here, as are all other correspondence provided I have not forgotten any. Hmm ooh I have just thought of at least one and it is an audio recording!

So much data, so little time!! LMAO!

Atos NOV 14

Paramed 231014-2

Paramed 231014-1



I finally got to Barnet Hospital’s Accident & Emergency department yesterday. It went well… eventually.

I was told a couple of tests and its over. To overcome the boredom I typed out a narration of sorts below…

Well I am currently in Barnet Hospital’s Accident and Emergency and as I told reception I am for days late getting here.

Well I say I am in A&E but the sign in the wall says urgent care centre?! I have been to Barnet two or maybe three times but have never been to the A&E before yet I remember an incident with a headphone silicone ear piece but that was nowhere near this department. This is at the very rear of the hospital, guessing facing west? The waiting room has dressing faces two directions and before me is a door starting ‘Urgent Care Centre’ above it where nurses and other plain clothed people emerge and call out patients names.

Confusingly there is a door to the immediate right of me that appears to have a waiting room? No sign above the door describing it and I cannot help but wonder if that is the A&E waiting room?

Of much more interest to me which had me raise an eyebrow is that on either side of the door to the unknown waiting room is a A4 laminated sign staying that patients and visitors are not allowed to photograph and film the hospital. Ooh yes it’s so tempting to pull my phone out and photograph that as I imagine the ironic nature that particular post would have. But I cannot be bothered this time around… but that can suddenly change.

I paused there for a moment because I heard a ruckus. It says a woman’s voice followed by a man’s. I then looked up and see a lady in grey saying “I told you I hurt my back!” followed by a portly gentleman with his hands behind her shepherding her towards the exit. She stated that she had no money for a taxi and he stated it was ‘bit his problem!’ Hmm ‘Lady in Grey’ sounds like a good title for the post?
I don’t know what the problem was but I had to feel for her. The waiting room is fully packed and it was embarrassing. Especially when the large gentleman said what he did. I hate waiting if it turns out to be a long time. They should give you badges with your name on on big letters and then you could listen to music. But then again as I find is always the case and never been able to figure it out, that is that they can call out the names and never get an answer? Sometimes this could be two or three names in a row?!

Also quite peculiar today and changing the subject slightly is the weather. It is incredibly warm and I have a tee shirt on and could easily have worn shorts! Well it is somewhere around the 26th or 27th October, I’m an idiot and is the 27th! It is apparently going to stay like this for stay days while I understand that Scotland has been pummelled with excrement heavy rain and still is! I dare say the news and tabloids will be awash with stories, pictures and films of people being flooded out? They do love a dreadful heartbreaking story but only if it comes with great visuals and not too serious or big that you rock the boat too much and upset those they are affiliated with who hasn’t very deep pockets and want to keep them this way.

That was just a little pop at the news media there and I am not quite sure how many more of those I am going to be able to make? Hopefully I might know by the time I have this this little post.

That peculiar sign has large font for the words “No photos, please” before it goes on to explain you cannot film either. Very odd.  Cannot help but wonder if this is because of me? After all this was ground zero for the early stages and I think might have been the first actual hospital I recorded before moving on to others like St. Michael’s, Royal Free, Guy’s and others. Though now I think about it it cannot be as that would have to be Chase Farm, surely?

Still it is close enough to ground zero to be a extremely likely factor?

Damn, I should have made a note of what time I came in here. I am also annoyed at one of my own and rare oversights that has only just occurred.

There seems to be no Wifi in the hospital either which is very bizarre? There are a couple of the usual BT Wifi hotshots that want you to pay £4 for a bloody hour?! Hmm mauve if I had ordered the BT Affinity I could log onto them for free? Double damn!

Also one reason I took so long is I needed a bath before I came up here which I only managed to force to do this morning. However I am stuck with someone that makes me want to put on a Peter Griffin voice while standing in his kitchen conversing with his son Chris while trying to work with daughter Meg on the animated comedy called ‘Handy Quacks” by standing up and saying then shouting “She’s got BO, SHE’S GOT BO!!” before hiding being the back of my chair! Lol. I do not know what the gendre of the source of the dreadful BO is as they are behind me somewhere and looking won’t make the smell evaporate. Lol.

It feels like I have been here an hour and ten minutes have passed by since I first realised I had not logged the time. Ooh but now I seem to remember looking at my watch after I got off the bus and it was just after 2pm.

So just over an hour then and all I can think of doing to pass the time away is type this out! Suffering sticklebacks!

I am also being bugged by Android while doing this because as well as the usual spelling corrections it gets wrong and the changing of words into this that do not exist and typing out ‘I’ to which it mostly changes into another vowel Android seems to think its a word,  like ‘O’  and ‘U’ it keeps stopping my typing to tell me that the ‘Play Service has stopped responding’!

Oops just got called in, ticked off for not going in sooner and the words I expected to hear which I thought were the words I was sure did not want to alarm me with…’ STOMACH CANCER’. So now my second wait until a nurse calls me to do some tests.

Yeah to be honest I did not want to put the words of the number one suspect at the very top of the list online. Because it may have been something else to what I was originally thinking, while also different to what the Doctor was thinking.

Colitis and Crohn’s Disease were two suspects on the list with a few others but I had ruled the out basepoint the symptoms I had missing from their list.

Also I had long suspected my Uncle had died from this and I heard it was bad but kept quiet. Each time I was heaving up vomit and excreting razor blades from my rear I remembered my grandmother telling me how her father died of it and it was pretty bad.

So my Uncle and my Great Grandfather in the branch I studied carried the Fibromyalgia genetics, died of Stomach Cancer?

This was far too much a coincidence and you can imagine what theory? Right for annoyed there with Android and went into settings to override their smug faces and attitudes… well was going to say I stopped all their ‘Play Services’ but the message came up again. Hence why I did smugness because they know jack shit but think they know better then everyone else in the world?

That master race shit again.

Turned off Wifi now see if that stops it happening? I like the way they do not offer you the report feature, like saying “oh no, it can’t possssssibly be our software at fault?! Other people’s Apps maybe but not ours, no way.!” Lol.

When I returned to the waiting area I was greeted with the sight and sounds of someone trying to be revived! A nurse shouting a name at an unconscious lady in a wheelchair with the family standing their and as I found another seat I looked up to see her being wheeled away.

I hope nothing untoward happens though her family did not appear to be overly concerned.

I have just seen portly boy walk through and out the door and turns out he is security.

Hmm just looked at the clock and I wonder how long there is to wait and whether or not there will be another wait as well as the pondering about whether I will have to stay.

Oddly enough this is the first time in my life I have ever walked into hospital with things in my bag in case I am kept in. My Inguinal Hernia operation does not count and I just realised that I was not supposed to stay in over night on that one but did.

I actually had to fumble things a bit too with the recording device as I did not want to leave it on as I could be here a long time. Added to this though I did bring back up battery power I did not think about a plug in charger! Moron!

A bit worrying is I have had few a few twinges of abdominal pain too and do not want the incident like the other night to repeat itself. I forgot to ask the Doctor I saw of the was somewhere quiet and secluded I could wait! Moron!

Someone is concerned and complaining about someone and is a lady soaking about her mum I think. Cannot help wonder if it’s that lady in grey?

Luckily the pain is on and off and only mild. If it stays like this is nothing.

Oops, got called in again. Also fumbled again too! Still nothing untoward say said and oddly I now find myself waiting for a third time? Bizarre and I do not think I have ever had to wait three times before? I am sure of it.

On this occasion I had my blood pressure taken and my temperature. I also find out that the Paramedic that arrived at my house say an emergency response unit they send ahead in emergencies in case someone is legally dying and to make sure that they do not. 

I asked how long he had worked at the hospital and he said six years. He asked, once again, both what was happening, umm, and why I had not come sooner? UMM, feeling mule a stuck record here and that’s when I explained that I had phoned ‘111’and had an ambulance act to me. Plus I previously thought this was Fibromyalgia and once again explained me theory. The first Doc, I just remembered, said Fibromyalgia dies not cause Diarrhea and I said “Oh yes it does Doc, trust me on that and it can cause consultation too! I know it’s poorly understood by a great many Doctors and I have a high amount of knowledge in this area.”

While I was typing that paragraph there was an announcement over the loudspeaker by the hospital staff who asked in a very sarcastic manner, which I thought was not only funny but a waste of time, when suddenly two Arab speaking.

Oops called in again just as I moments away from explaining that I have to have some blood tests along with an ECG. The ECG mention raised my eyebrow again and any more people might mistake me for Roger Moore?!

Oh the previous nurse just popped his head around the curtain and said “Oh! Your here? Blood?” “Yes” I replied and he said “Good!”

I am now telephoned to a seat in the waiting area again. The very lovely nurse told me that my ECG was normal, as this was performed by her in there, and when I asked what it was for she stated my heart rate was high, odd as I did not notice anything myself and told her that. I am not scared nor nervous in anyway so it should not be high. Though as I was walking back to the waiting area I did think that maybe this had something to do with me feeling hyped up, hard wired and fidgety all the time?

I have put this dien to the Fibromyalgia and oddly is something I have wanted to bring up with my new GP but keep forgetting to! Bum and bugger!

Hmm now there seems to be a Policeman here sitting next to a guy and listening to him tell a story. Oh in actual fact and in a unintended sexist fashion I failed to see the the Policeman is actually sitting in front of him to the left and immediately left of him sits a tiny Policewoman. My apologies if anyone reading this are themselves a Policewoman. If it’s you reading this your very cute! Lol.

Well I say Police but they could be those plastic Police? But I can see their numbers on their shoulders and I doubt the Plastics would handle finding out how someone ended up in hospital?

So a look at the clock again and this time it is 4.42pm and I sit here waiting for the big one. The test result that tells me whether or not I have stomach cancer. I think the nurse was surprised I knew what they suspected? Well it’s not rocket science and before I even turned to the Internet and ‘111’ the right had occurred to me. Like I said I thought I was dying I was in that much pain and would not have liked anyone I was related to, to witness what I was going through. God of I had a partner that genuinely cared about me I dead to think of putting someone through that! Watching me in these moments.

A little nugget there as I always find a way to get one in and so easy to do with my life, lol.

I find myself right now in a similar moment to one I lived a decade ago.

I looked up and suddenly wondered at being called. The caller of my name would have my test result and if positive have something of a burden out upon them. I suddenly flashed back to the vision of my father arriving at Chase Farm Hospital in an ambulance. He had sadly had already died and I did not get told this so did not know. I saw his eyes as the trolley he was in went by and the thought he may be dead crossed my mind. An Eon seemed to go by before I felt a hand in my shoulder from someone who walked by me while focusing hard not to make sure contact with me. I will never forget the look on their faces as I followed them into ‘The Quiet Room’ and sat me down. One half of me was telling myself I was imagining things but was beaten down by the intelligent side.

Well I just got called in again and had my heart rate checked again as well as my stomach using a stethoscope and horror of horrors while the blood results are still wanting they want to do thread dreaded finger probe of death and embarrassment! Noooo, suddenly stomach Cancer dies not seem ask that bad?! Lol.

Damn it?! Now I have Peter bloody Griffin in my head doing his prostate exam!

Damn it! I got to the word ‘prostrate’ adove and he returned and I have in. Bizarrely it hurt but there was nothing of concern. My word I am desperate to find out what this is and put a stop to it! Like I told an anaesthetist once , “I don’t care if you kill me, just don’t cause me any body pain!” to which she said “and don’t disk like that you will be fine!”  My only operation to study of my first Inguinal Hernia.

My teleportation is working over time as while typing out that last paragraph I find myself bash in the waiting room for the…. umm third time? Wait! No the fifth time! Lol. A bit shocked to see it is dark outside too. It is 5.15pm.

The latest Doctor who did the prostate exam thing…. brrrr…. told me that he did not think it was anything to worry about before then telling me he had requested a ‘new’ blood test to add to the others, or other? He then stated that I would have to go back to the GP, too late to make an appointment now, and be referred off to endoscopy as my oesophagus could be causing bleeding. That’s new!

So I am still babbling away like a moron on my tablet pc using the word processor on my OfficeSuite Pro App (note to self :have you any idea how bloody boring you have sounded?!).

Well I assume the blood tests, or blood test, will rule out the stomach Cancer?

Damn it! Now I have teleported again only this time includes three stop offs after some quite unexpected things happening, or actually to be more descriptive being told.. or asked.

I get called in by the rather charming and extremely nice nurse I met earlier and I’m not complaining. Then she tells me they want some more tests and I think his odd this is as I was told that the blood test results would be the last and I’m outta here?! The right I would be kept in had long since evaporated and I was trying to remember nearby shops that might do Oyster Card top-ups because I cannot remember… no wait I think it was £1.55? Will I half better check. But I get asked for a urine sample, though this could be something shady by the hospital or rather NHS bosses? I then get told I need to go for an X-Ray too and for a few seconds I am confused and utter “X-Ray? Oh!” as I realise it’s over me suspecting I had broken my own rib or torn ligaments/tendons away from one. So a quick visit to the lavatory and now I am in a different waiting room while they get preheated beige calling my name. Well I say that because there s only one person here waiting and may have anyway been called? While sitting here the petite Policewoman and her partner along with the chap they are escorting about have come in and sat down to my left.

I have already handed the request firm to someone while leaning on the door frame of a quite peculiar reception. The chap before me had been called in so not long hopefully and I will be outta here?!

Yup done and I’m back to the original waiting room for the… hmm again. Hopefully not long now and my daughter had text me so I better answer.

Whoa that was quick. The finger of death called me back in before long. Turns out I am OK add far as sudden death is concerned. Which is bloody handy because I was worried about going under any general anaesthetic in hospital as I would have had to have made some phonecalls to do with this blog in case anything… let’s just say untoward happened. I had not actively put anything in place in case my number ever came up. I just kept putting it off.

I explained what happened to my daughter who then read the message that I actually had stomach Cancer and I just to quickly correct her. I did not want to tell anyone what the tests were for especially my daughter who had a mother who went through that worked her way through the A to Z of cancers over around ten years or more. With literally one that she actually told me she had she is doing exceptionally well with it. I was told about it umm, let me see 9 years ago? Apparently 75% of those suffering with this untreatable cancer do not make it beyond five years. Yup she is doing well.

So yes I hardly wanted to do that to my daughter. Of course once the tests were in I could explain why.

I’m in the clear where death is concerned. But there is still the diagnosis to discover. I wonder if it was a combination of things? Two things could explain the symptoms and I had never thought of this earlier. The bleeding from the oesophagus seems to be the favourite presently and maybe my original thought of food poisoning? Maybe the latter could have caused the former for instance? I had better be extremely careful with my diet for awhile. Which is a pain in the arse thing to do without help in all honesty. Literally physical help as well as financial, hence just one of many reasons I have battled with the DWP for years.

Despite my all clear I could not help but think of all those that do get diagnosed with stomach cancer. I never looked into it in any depth but it enough to scare my grandmother half to death and fear Doctors and hospitals fire the next fifty years. I don’t know if he was still alive while my father was a child but my Dad had the exact same fears. This also extended to dentists.

Therefore I was a bit of a surprise to them at first my ability to endure pain and then think nothing of going to a Doctors, Dentists or hospital when it got too much. There was a situation or two they saw me in baits bad states due to hospital ops that had them convinced I would then develop an aversion.

Not going to Doctors led to them dying before their time, though there were other… factors involved too.

I cannot imagine enduring that amount of pain that I did for too long. If this is what is involved with Stomach Cancer I am amazed it due bit get more media attention. But then maybe drugs today are a lot better at keeping the pain down?

Oh I just remembered that my X-rays were clear so I can go back, at least I think I can,  to stating that I have never broken a bone. Lol.

The can gets kicked further down the long and dusty road.
Wow I typed it something to make Tolstoy blush while I was in hospital and I did not even start immediately! Lol. Imagine if I’d been there a few days?


While checking out a few things to do with pc games I stumbled across a link. This to a report regarding a game reviewer on YouTube, it states the most popular but I am not familiar with him personally.

The webpage is linked below and it makes for some interesting reading if I say so myself. Very interesting.

I placed the link on here, instead of my CPU & Computing blog because it unusually had links to here and not the other one. Based on what the primary subject matter.

The game reviewer closed off the comments on his YouTube channel and once I saw this in the highlight I immediately knew why and that this would make an interesting read. I also knew that it would mirror my own thoughts to a degree and things I have witnessed for many, many years.

No one more than me is well aware that the world is full of people that make themselves out to be greater than they are. In many different ways. Almost all of the time without much to back it up, but they will argue about this with you way beyond their station and capabilities. Quite often this borders job ridiculous and other times way beyond that even!

I don’t know why they do this.

One I know very literally detests the very idea of being called an idiot and yet they open themselves up to being labeled this by arguing about this they know nothing about, insist they are correct when the subject is nowhere near their vicinity even. I have witnessed this from people who have no qualifications from their schooling whatsoever and even some unable to read and write.

But I assure you that they will blunder into an argument or even tell you your wrong when your explaining this that have actually taken place, in effect calling you a liar.

Some are so literally obsessed with this that they will move in among friends of yours and then impress their false views upon your friends. One cannot say whether this is deliberate or they actually believe their own bullshit? Some can be so obsessed that it is literally classed as a personality disorder they refuse to admit they have and I have seen this denial in people who are actually undergoing psychiatric treatment. They actually believe that they are all wrong and there is nothing wrong with them. But at the same time I have witnessed the same people chastise and be sarcastic to educated people for staying Doctors are wrong, even though they may have proved this several times previously.

On one occasion the obsession can be so great that they feel the need to… ‘get one over’ on the person in question. Sometimes this takes the form of a breach of the law. This is thought by the person with the mental health disorder to be smart and their victim will not be told but this does not matter for it is enough to massage their own ego to simply think they got away with it. In actual fact this is actually and foremost a dreadful breach of trust of the worst kind. While the perpetrator smiles to themselves that they actually achieved this and their victim is none the wiser they are completely blind to the truth that they are found out and had been for some time. Also that the perpetrator had spent enough time flapping their lips air post shenanigans and jobs that have the game away. They then continue to do the exact same thing after the event too. Their sudden change in their… routine along with subject matter in normal conversations guide themselves away yet again and continue to do so. When the subject matter in the usual and regular conversations is severely limited this allows the omission to stand out even more.

When an… offender, trying to be kind here, stands out as much as this they tend to render themselves as that which they absolutely detest to be labeled and would normally way overreact to even the slightest insinuation of.

Being a total idiot.

You can also turn this to complete moron when the person in question continues advertising their own guilt week after week after week.

This gets worse when the offender had failed to realise that their victim has instead playing games back by dropping boulder sized hints to many things that are just completely missed. Month after month after month.

This might be an extreme example of something I myself have witnessed and taken notes on, let’s leave it at that for now. But it seems like people with odd personality traits are more widespread than I could ever realise. Only dwarfed by the number of different varieties in these peculiarities.

Speaking of which the term peculiarities is wrong but deliberate. In actual fact the terms ‘odd’ and ‘out of the ordinary’ and even ‘abnormal’ wound all be wrong. Why, I hear you ask?

I stated earlier that these.. ‘personalities’ seem to now be far more numerous than I could ever have imagined? Well yes they are!

These different personalities are so numerous they may have the ratio and numbers required to den them the ‘norm’?! Yup!

Makes the fact that a so called GP previously tried to label me as mad even more insulting, lol. Almost as much as the fact no less than three Doctors wanted to try and claim that anger and frustration is same as ‘violent’?! Yes that’s why they have three completely separate… ‘labels’, or words. Because they all mean the same. Lol.

Now this chap below has become fed up with these… ‘personalities’ and stated that there are nothing but rubbish in his comments mostly...

Self Advertising

Now I did not scrutinise every word for a list of… ‘TYPES’ but I mentioned a few. There will also be others I guess like ‘fanboyism’ and the arguments and aggression will be dien to fanboys this I assure you. Mostly I write about those divided over computer chips like Intel and AMD. This also includes AMD once again against nVidia. Intel make CPU’s (Central Processing Unit or main brain of a computer) while nVidia makes GPUs (Graphics Processing Units or the chip that puts everything where it needs to be on your monitor screen, over simplified somewhat but in what it does). In gaming A GPU also calculates the three dimensional values of a ‘gaming world’. This used to be simply maps but has evolved into worlds. Every detail of every static object and where it is along with that which sound be seen by you the viewer. If it sounds impressive then now think of all the moving objects in this world along with their ‘artifical intelligence’ and physics of objects, moving vehicles, animals and of course weather and sunlight.

Yet still people are unhappy at the existence of some… this and companies. Very weird.

AMD get a lot of flak and false accusations. They get ridiculous for misinforming yet everyone else does it too. I don’t like it but your acting on behalf of the pot when you call the kettle black. Double weird. AMD also make both CPUs and GPUs as well as successfully combining the two into one chip now known as APUs.

Despite the fact that the ever shrinking chips meant that it was logical to combine the two on one piece of silicon AMD gets flak from it.

Intel bought out a CPU a couple of years back using a new architecture that leapt forward in performance, the previous one was no slouch, codenamed ‘Sandy Bridge’. AMD bought out something that day not quite up to scratch running two year old software and games. They got ridiculed for it. They did not do themselves any fascia by employing the techniques so fashionable in recent times that had now ground the entire planet into an almost halt. Bullshitting and over hyping their products.

You get the idea and yet without competition I can tell you that relying on Intel alone they would then do the very thing that also passes off the consumer no end. Drip feeding for top dollars.

Everything is run by morons without a clue and yet there are also no end of consumers without a clue that feel so happy about their product they feel they have to defend the companies like their lives depend on it.

The beauty of gaming is the sheer variety. Though saying that many… types of games or game worlds are spoilt for choice. Others are curiously missing including some that were once abundant, flight simulators and space exploration.

Imagine my surprise at Truck Simulations and even Goat, yes goat, Simulations?!

We went mention the bad games, the good games with bad elements and the publishing houses wirth millions while not being needed anymore and have not been for years while trying to find ever more ways of getting money from you, many underhanded.

They will argue and become aggressive over games too.

What I have witnessed is the pure pressure people insist on putting on others to have their views accepted and agreed with. Trolling turned up some years ago where the most obsessed would… troll website to website and then wreak havoc in places that were not agreeable with their narrow minded views.

I tried to warn governments, authorities and the news media years ago that this sound be dealt with but it feel on deaf ears. Now is never out of the news. So much so that now anything goes and added to this a whole list of British celebrities and famous and powerful people who have been doing some dreadful things to children. Some too horrific to mention and some names almost too incredible to be believed.

One by one the names have appeared in the media.

Their own ignorance is now leasing to their own downfall, albeit slowly so maybe it’s balancing itself out? It is showing all the bad elements whether they be famous or not.

I have noted in recent times that many people are getting fed up with these narrow minded morons and their incessant desire to achieve some personal goal. Be this done weird kicks or selfish and after money if the most inane and brain dead way they think is smart purely because they could and did do it? Well hire could it possibly fail? Other morons have done it before.

Pattern recognition is a basic human element. Some only see the more obvious in the early stages while others caw an see the more… intricate early on. Repeat the same patterns over and over again and they start to stand out more and more to more and more people.

Gradually the whole experience is ruined for the decent, honest and genuine people out there.

Pewdiepie is the name of the YouTube guy who has grown somewhat despondent with commentors and I for one know where he is coming from.

Cannot help but wonder where things will go over the next couple of years? Better I hope?


Well no sooner had I finished the post ‘The Final Curtain Part Two’ and I see this BBC report regarding some screw ups at yet another hospital?!

These stories really do seem to run from one end of the country to the other! Southampton, err one up north somewhere and now on I in Suffolk. Of c order the could be others I have forgotten or not known about. Sure as eggs are eggs there will be more.

When are those idiots that think themselves a species apart and not accountable because their high salaries apparently excuse them going to smell the coffee?!

They really need to shake msn things up in the anarchic and archaic and flawed system of careers in the public services?! I would imagine private companies have similar problems. Look around you. Nothing you have stated has come to pass! Your proven yourselves idiots and morons and nothing is going to change until YOU do this childish attitude of hogging all the toys! Your like male Dogs peeing on trees shouting “This is MY TREE and MY AREA!”

all the time just dragging the entire nation ever slowly downwards into the fiery pits of hell. Or Mordor! Lol.

Patient had ‘wrong part operated on’


“I don’t want to alarm”

That is a line I will remember for the rest of my days.

This post is going to be an unusual one. Normally if I include a link they are at the bottom of my posts. On this one I will put up a link shortly to a page and everything afterwards would be quots taken from this page.

I first want to explain in part how I found this page. I very recently came up with an idea on a search by linking to things together I not only never thought could possibly be linked but which I have never come across before, but will state the was plenty of opportunities. To find out.

Quite unfortunately I found it.

This may turn out to be a nightmare scenario in just a few days that would seriously put to an end almost all my plans. All of them, bar one.
If fact the very creation of this blog was in part a kind of… insurance of a kind. In the event that I was prevented by an outside force from continuing my work this very blog would, way ahead of schedule, finish the job in a way that would reverberate for a very long time to come.

Now I had hoped that the emerging of an… opposing force would feel to materialise and believe me when I say that this one was not foreseen.

Unforeseen or not I had to plan for every eventuality while first gathering, acquiring, planning, tricking and manipulating everything and everyone I needed to do to get to where I am right at this very moment.

Now if it turns out that indeed what is…. suspected by some turns out to be the case I have no doubt whatsoever that the timing of this… emergence will be talked about by more and more people for the foreseeable years. This is because the timing will seem… very hard to believe for many. I have no doubt that if I do turn out to be rather unlucky that this… timing and the incidents will spark of God knows how many conspiracy theories for a very, VERY long time to come. It will also get crazy because…

I simply cannot say that any of these conspiracy theories will be wrong because I do not know what they are. I also do not know the truth to this that have gone on in recent times either.

There are some odd recent events that have dumbfounded me and I could not explain. I have mentioned this things on here too.

In any event that something very odd occurs I cannot explain away then this is what it is… unexplainable. In situations like this any theory,  no matter how bizarre sounding, cannot be ruled out. A theory is exactitude what it says on the tin, until the day it is disproved. A conspiracy theory means that a group of people, big or small, believe that other groups have conspired to work against another group. Invariably is used to say that one group belonging to government/rich/powerful people or any combination thereof have worked against less fortunate groups or poorer groups. Sometimes these can be shady,  cloak and dagger this groups who don’t exist on paper. Other times this could be cuts the use, I won’t say ‘clever use’, of organisations meant to be servants to the people.

I always knew that eventually my actions would lead to the eye opening discoveries of that which I have told everyone about that visits this blog. I just did not know how this would occur. Indeed I stated from day one, or at least early on, that both my plans, actions and endeavours asking with this blog were… many faceted.

Well a number of these facts were bit visible to me while others were merely unlikely.

This week will prove this theory one way or the other. There is a question and the answer is yet to come. I can’t tell you the question because it would not be right and I’m sure declaring the question before it is asked in the correct… scenario could also backfire on me. In light of recent events I would rather not allow the possibility of backfires. No siree!

But the question can be told when the answer has been given and not before. But that is a lot sooner than you might currently be thinking? Or indeed I imagine that the largest percentage of those that read this might glance up at the date this was posted and realise it’s possible the answer may already have been given. You would probably be quite correct too as I am sure that 24 to 48 hours would suffice.

So without any further ado, here is one link I promised to do with Fibromyalgia and then a series of… quite deliberated pasted fur the rest of the post…

Research suggests fibromyalgia may be the result of:

Trauma, especially whiplash injuries.Hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenal axis (HPA) dysfunction.Emotional/physical/mental stress.Low thyroid function.Low serotonin states.Adrenal dysfunction.Chronic viral, mycoplasma, and or bacterial infections.Endocrine disorders.Sleep disorders.

The truth is we really don’t know for sure what causes fibromyalgia.

The decrease in DHEA levels correlates with the general decline of cell-mediated immunity and increased incidence of cancer. DHEA protects the thymus gland, a major player in immune function. My fibromyalgia patient’s usually take a special adrenal cortex glandular supplement.

What We Do Know

Fibromyalgia is now thought to arise from a miscommunication between the nerve impulses of the central nervous system. The neurons, which supply the brain, become more excitable, exaggerating the pain sensation. This over-amplification of pain is referred to as “central sensitization.” Fibromyalgia patients have a reduction in their pain threshold (allodynia), an increased response to painful stimuli (hyperalgesia) and an increase in the duration of pain after nociceptor stimulation (persistent pain). Individuals with fibromyalgia syndrome have low levels of serotonin, a 4-fold increase in nerve growth factor, and elevated levels of substance P. Nerve growth factor (NGF) is a member of a family of peptides known as the neurotrophins. The exposure of nociceptive sensory neurons to NGF leads to up-regulation of substance P in sensory neurons. Substance P, the neuropeptide in spinal fluid, is a neurotransmitter that is released when axons are stimulated. Increased levels of substance P increase the sensitivity of nerves to pain or heighten awareness of pain. Although it’s not fully understood, fibromyalgia patients have an imbalance of the hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis. This imbalance creates hormonal inconsistencies, which disrupt the body’s ability to maintain homeostasis.

Many of the most common fibromyalgia symptoms including widespread muscle pain, fatigue, poor sleep, gastrointestinal problems, and depression regularly occur in people with various neuroendocrine disorders, including those manifested by HPA dysfunction. Researchers believe suppression of the HPA (quite likely from chronic stress), which results in lowering human growth hormone (HGH), dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA), cortisol, and other hormones, is aggravated by the chronic pain and poor sleep associated with fibromyalgia.